Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Saturday, June 10, 2006
I'm getting married in the morning. Last time I could legitimately say that, I was dressed in a bonnet and in my school play. And, admitedly, I sang it rather than said it.
I feel a mixture of excitement and a feeling akin to a small rat nibbling on my innards. I don't really know what I'm nervous about, because the nervousness currently covers about everything: Simon not turning up, me not turning up, registrar not turning up, fainting / crying / getting a migraine, spilling kir royal down my white dress, having a fight with someone, breaking my ankle by wearing stupid shoes and a stupid dress, being made up to look like a drag queen, no-one turning up, being attacked by killer bees, getting food poisoning from my carefully chosen wedding breakfast...
The fainting one is probably the most likely because it's apparently going to be 29 degrees and the corset in my dress is so tight that my internal organs get re-arranged, and I can only breathe in short panting breaths like a pervert.
Anyway, I still have so much organising to do (and apparently there's this thing on the telly called the World Cup) so I'd better go.
I will post again once I am officially a Missus and am back from my honeymoon in Paris.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
As someone who is officially on a diet, I would like to dedicate this space to Mars Bars. They truly are the daddy of all chocolate. As soon as my wedding's over, I'm going to buy a few hundred of them, melt them down and inject them intravenously into my bloodstream. I am determined to be a thin bride but a fat wife.